04 December 2010

two days worth (long)

yesterday, feeling a bit less wobbly than on thursday, i decided to test my strength and also get away from these four walls. i searched for something fun to dress in, found a skirt i'd had hidden in the closet for two years (tags still on) looked at the size and said now or never. i put it on and found the top i remembered i'd purchased to go with it and with a sweater and my new boots all laced up took a gander at myself and thought... i look a bit like an old fashioned school marm!

so off i went, to my work, to deliver that bread i baked a few days before. i ended up spending over two hours there, visiting and catching up. i couldn't believe it when i left and realized what the time was. everyone asked about my eye and what had happened and all said how they wanted me back ever so soon. i was able to see where my new area will be and it looks like i will have a nice setup and will get to make a nice little cubbiehole for myself. sigh...

i had a few dizzy spells while there but after sitting and resting i felt okay so i proceeded on with my plans for the day and next up was a trip to the library. i haven't been in years. my nose is so persnickety these days and i've been worried about how sensitive i would be to bringing in books from the library but after realizing how badly i need something new to read and how i just can NOT purchase new books like i want to, this seemed the only way. so...i picked up a few books...

then i went to see my mum, had lunch with her and came home with a turkey leg and the ham bone (with extra meat). i don't know if one turkey leg is enough to make stock with or not. any suggestions as to what i could do with it? she gave me some extra turkey meat too.

anywho, i made a stop at the grocers for a quick thing or two and came out with four bags. do you do that? go in for one or two things but just can't stop? i do that everywhere. i have such bad impulse control when shopping.

i have been craving collard greens and somehow missed them at the grocers so this morning to the farmers market i went, fingers crossed that they were still open this late in the year and surely someone would have collard greens. well, they were there, and busy! i bought apples and collards and that is all. i passed on the beautiful french hubbard pumpkins, nosegay bouquets, cyclamens, poinesettas, paperwhites and christmas cactus. aren't you proud? i wanted to bring them all home to live here in the cottage. but no, i said to myself, when you are feeling better and able to take better care of yourself, then you can bring more plant friends home!

oh, where was i? yes, so i left the market quite proud of myself. went to run for yet another prescription from the pharma and came home. then got a bee in my bonnet that i wanted to string fairie lights around my front porch. i get out my steppy stool and ms. hammer. find my little cup hooks (they seem to be perfect for hanging strings of fairie lights) and realize i don't have enough little cup hooks. so with the bee stinging away in my bonnet i grab my purse and keys and head to the dollar store. where they have NO CUP HOOKS. :( light bulbs - yes, they have those and i'd forgotten them at the grocers the day before so i'll get them; a little glass plate for setting candles on to catch the wax so as not to mess up the table - check, oh yes, you can never have too many of those in a cottage that almost always has candles burning; scotch tape - 2/$1 only you just bought tape at the pharma and it was only 1 roll not two and it was over two dollars and change so oh yes, most definitely i'll take that thankyouverymuch.

bee still buzzing even more determinedly i then go to the grocers, yes...again! i'm only going in for little cup hooks, i know exactly where they are. i don't even need a buggie or a little hand held carrier. i know just what i need. oh look! the candy canes i was looking for yesterday! and they're on SALE! well, just one package. okay, now to the cup hooks. hmmm...while i'm here i might as well see if they've restocked their pumpkin since they seem to be out the last several times i've been. no, no pumpkin, oh there's the manager, let me just ask..oh here it is, thanks so much. yes...four cans of pumpkin, i think i do need a carrier after all.

well...much more was bought, this and that...not too much more, just a few things that i need for various recipes that i've seen that i've wanted to make. but i did get the cup hooks! (i've only achieved one anchored in the porch ceiling so far - but it will be done by end of friday. it was just sooo cold! and i was soooo tired!)

did i mention the weather here? cold! very cold! which i love. but i only love it when it is accompanied by snow. so when the forecasters started talking about snow this weekend, i didn't want to get too excited. they've lied to me before afterall. many times. but they kept saying it, a dusting they said, over and over...a dusting...

and around noon...it started...

and just before dark it looked like this...

squee! i went out and played in it earlier in the day. this first snowfall of the winter brings a bittersweet joy. oh how my beastie boy would have loved this. while i wandered snapping photos of this or that i looked around for him and realized he wasn't there rooting and romping in the snow. but it is still snow and i am still just as much in love with it, and with winter, as i always have been.

supposedly the snow is to continue to fall through the night until early morning. so there may be even more when i wake. i'm sure to be looking out the window every once in a while to see if there is more snow falling. and as the temps aren't to get out of the 30's for the next several days, it may hang around for a bit.

i hope that your weekend is going well and that there is some happy thing brightening your days and nights...


ps... i also hope i didn't bore you wonky with all my little rambling. :)

pps...about that skirt - when i first purchased it two years ago it was at the end of winter and it is a wool skirt and lined to boot and i didn't get a chance to wear it before the hot weather came. when winter came around again, it was too small... :( the now or never is because, well, it is too BIG! yep! TOO BIG! i had to keep hiking it up all day! it is an elastic waist so i can take it in or rather i can find someone who knows what they are doing and have them take it in for me and maybe can wear it another season. :) yippee for too big clothes!

02 December 2010

another round of ramblings

i've been taking it easy today. sitting on the sofa either reading my book or reading my favorite blogs. there was even a short nap involved. to me, december first ushers in the beginning of winter. yes, i know the "official" start isn't until the 21st, but i'm a rebel. :P

so the past few days have been busy. taking all the fall decor away(finally) and putting out my winter decor here and there. i decided not to put up a tree this year and i'm okay with that. i also took the time to create an actual meal. yeah, using pots and pans, real food, spices, ingredients. i know...shocking... i'd been surviving on crackers and cheese, pb&j half sandwichs, mini bags of popcorn and thanksgiving celebration leftovers for the past two weeks. i think i've mentioned my lack of appetite before, so it makes it hard to cook as i never want to eat and i've now got this constant pressure sitting in my throat and diaphram area. ugh.

but it was nice to take the time and effort to put a meal together. it wasn't a lot, green beans, baked chicken in a mushroom sauce with cheese over penne pasta. and i can eat on it all week. i also ended up making pumpkin bread that same night. (that was a huge mess as the big cans i'd bought a few weeks ago and was so excited to use turned out to not be pumpkin but PUMPKIN PIE MIX! and i'd already added in all the spices to the mix and was adding what i thought was pumpkin last!) ugg...turned out pretty good. i was planning to take it in to my co-workers this morning but had a little dilemma last night that kept me from being able to go out today. (more on that in a bit)

yesterday, mum took me out for lunch and a little shopping and window shopping. i picked up a few of the gifts i need to get for holiday presents. then we took a stroll through williams-sonoma (i drooled the whole time) and i went into anthropologie and drooled some more...

after lunch, it was time for my hair appointment. i'd been looking forward to it for a while. time for coloring and we added more purple this time. :) i wish we'd done it in bigger streaks but next time we will, she's already said. i just really like having it there, even if it doesn't show up a lot it makes me happy knowing it is there.

so last night i started a new medication. the doctor had warned me that i would need to rise from bed slowly because it could cause me to be lightheaded. around 3 am i woke needing to use the facilities. so i sat up in bed and waited about 5 minutes before i stood up and went into the bathroom. next thing i know, i'm waking up on the bathroom floor. i felt like i was having a seizure. i crawl back to the toilet (i know...tmi) and then... that's right...i'm waking up on the floor again. this time though i must have hit my head on the sink because i've got quite the bump on my face. and my head is hurting much more than it usually does. i was finally able to get myself finished and back to bed. my face is bruised and swollen, both knees bruised, neck, shoulders, arms hurting. head is very much hurting. this morning when i woke, i sat up very slowly in bed. then i just sat there for about half an hour before i would even attempt to stand up. every step was like walking through a very narrow tiny tunnel and scared me so.

hence the coziness photo as i was afraid to lay back in the bed, since it takes so long to get up once i've had a lie in and why i settled myself on the sofa. i did talk with the doctor's office about another medicine that we are having problems getting approved through insurance and while i had the lady on the phone i mentioned the fainting and she said not to take it again since i've only taken the one dose. (yes, ONE pill did that to me) and i have an appointment to see the doctor on monday so can discuss these concerns with him then.

i'd like to extend another thankyousoverymuch to those who have commented and sent me messages of guidance and hope in my struggles with my health. it means a lot to me. i am trying, using your encouragement, your words, to step outside of myself a little each day and to try for some joy, some happiness to make each day a little brighter. maybe, i reason with myself, a little brightness one day, will lead to a little more brightness the next, and so on and so forth. i know you all know what i mean. i read it in your blogs, see how you all have so much joy and happy to share. and i admire how you do it time and time again. maybe you do have hardships and sadness, but you don't seem to show it. i am one who says what i feel. which is why there are sometimes long silences here. because i know the dreary becomes overwhelming and i don't want to spew it too far or wide. i don't want to always be known for bringing drab and sad to people.

well...i'm off to search the internets for some self learning instructions on how to crochet. i'm so inspired by lucy and many others and want to learn to make granny squares. :)