time to say goodbye

i've been in tears for about the past 12 hours...i realized last night that the time has come...i have to let my beastie boy go... i can see the pain in his eyes, i watch as he stumbles and falls and spends 10 minutes just trying to stand upright and then is frozen in fear of falling again...

i can't take it anymore...he doesn't deserve to suffer so i won't make him...now all i have to do is figure out how to say goodbye in the few hours we have left together...

blessings
~*~

experimenting

I was checking email and cuddling with the beastie when I happened to glance out the front window. The color outside was such a pretty pink/orange mix that I grabbed my camera and ran out to try to capture it.



The picture is a little darker than the light actually was, but it is pretty close to what I saw.

In an effort to do more of my favorite things, I did a little experimenting at dinner tonight. I needed to find something to have with the chili that I made over the weekend. I can't stand eating the same leftovers after the third or fourth meal. So, I try to do some different things with them. What can you do to make chili different?

I had some potatoes and homegrown bell peppers in a bowl on the counter and I'd been contemplating what I could do with them. What to do, what to do...

So, I tossed some butter in a skillet...



...chopped up some bell peppers, a little onion and a couple of small potatoes.



I tossed the onion and pepper into the pan first.



I added the potatoes a few minutes later. Then I sprinkled on a little freshly ground black pepper, sea salt and nice dusting of garlic powder.



I gave them a stir and cooked them until the potatoes where just a little soft and browned.



I heated up a bit of this weekends chili, topped it with a little shredded cheese and...

voila



It was pretty good, if I do say so myself. Simple, quick and a decent dinner.

I've been finding some very cool recipes online and am looking forward to trying some of them.

The apple and pumpkin breads that I took to work today were warmly received. I hope my co-workers won't mind being my guinea pigs when it comes to my baking. :)

A brief beastie update: Late yesterday afternoon, the amazing Dr. F (our favorite vet) called to check up on the beastie. I described his symptoms and his all night pee-fests. She prescribed a pain med which I immediately went to pick up. He snuck into bed with me last night and slept through the night. He didn't try to jump down at all and I was able to pick him up and lower him without too much trouble. He's still real wobbly on his legs and I can see some pain in his eyes. I think the pain medicine kind of drugs him a bit because he was very dizzy looking a few hours after he had it tonight. I guess we'll see how he does tonight. I'm to call Dr. F in the morning with another update. She is so fabulous!

Well, I'm off to do some more blog hopping. I need to work on the black and white scarf, but it is impossible to knit with this big satellite dish dog head in my lap. :)

blessings
~*~

over the weekend

It's been a sort of lazy weekend around here. We've been letting the beastie rest. I slept the first night on the floor beside him, hoping that would help him feel better, to have me close. That was a miserable night! Saturday he continued to rest and recuperate and I piddled around the house and made pumpkin bread and homemade chili. Saturday night was pretty rough. The beastie didn't want to sleep and had to go out to pee every couple hours. I tried to keep him on his dog bed and moved it into the bedroom beside my bed, but he just couldn't get settled. He kept falling down the stairs whenever we went out for him to pee. His legs are just not steady or strong anymore.

Sunday, I mostly surfed the internet, tried to keep up online with the Steelers game (since it wasn't on TV here) and watched the Tarheels basketball game. The beast wouldn't eat breakfast and was very lethargic. I was trying to get some roasted chicken for him, but couldn't get out of the house and couldn't get anyone to bring me one from the store. I was finally able to get him to eat late that afternoon. Last night was another round of no sleeping and constant wandering around the house/needing to pee. We must have gone out every 45minutes to an hour from 9am until about 6:30 this morning. I decided to stay home with him today because I'm worried about the constant need to pee (but apparently that is only at night) and because I was exhausted. I was able to get him to lay back down and so I could get a little sleep this morning. Now he's conked out on the sofa beside me, snoring.

This morning I made apple bread. I used the same recipe that I use for my pumpkin and banana bread, it's my grandmother's recipe. I was a little worried after I mixed it all up because the batter was more like a dough. But I went ahead and baked it anyway.



It looks okay, but tastes better. The crust is a bit crunchy which I'm not fond of on sweet breads.

I've been in a cooking/baking mood for a while now. I love to cook/bake but I get bored with the leftovers after the third or fourth meal. Something that I want to do is try new recipes. I want to experiment a bit with my cooking and start eating outside of my normal range of foods. I also want to do more baking. I'm so inspired by most everything here, here and here.

So, as part of my ever improving outlook on life, I'm going to start doing some of my favorite things. (That is what this blog is about, isn't it?) I hope to post recipes and pictures of some of my fun.

Tomorrow is back to work, lack of sleep or no, and back to the regular day to day stuff. I'm trying to come up with how to spend my Thanksgiving. I only have to spend the Sunday after with family, but that gives me Thursday, Friday and Saturday all to myself. I wonder how much fun I can have in those three days. :)

blessings
~*~

quick post

The beast came home last night. Yay! He's doing pretty good. He's not allowed up on the bed yet which means I slept on the floor last night... or tried to. :)

He has on an e-collar to keep him from picking at his incision.

Thanks for all your kind words, thoughts, wishes and prayers. It really means a lot to us.

Hopefully regular posting will resume...soon. :)
blessings
~*~

Gardening is fun...

Last night after work I spent 3 and 1/2 hours working in the yard. I planted a lilac, snowball and two small camellia's that my mum had brought from her house. I also got the parsley, woodruff and foxglove planted. Oh, and I moved my hydrangea to another (better) location. We also dug up some dead trees and cleaned out some borders.

I sure hope that the stuff I planted lives! I love lilac and the snowball is from a plant that was at my Grandmother's house (my paternal side) so it is very, very special to me.

Right now I'm sitting in the office (alone) trying to breathe. This morning I went in to the doctor for blood work and check up and explained that I have had a migraine for two and 1/2 weeks. So, he gave me a cortisone shot. About an hour ago, my throat started closing up and my tongue started to feel swollen and my chest started feeling very heavy. The symptoms haven't gone away, in fact they seem to be getting worse. I now have a weird sick feeling in my stomach, not like a nauseous feeling, just sick. Anyway, I called the doctor's office and left a message as they were closed for lunch. My migraine is getting worse and my vision is getting blurry. I hope they call soon.

My post feels very naked without a picture... so here is a picture of the beast in one of his calm states. He actually did very well this weekend laying in the sun and being quiet while I worked. It was nice. Now if he would just be like this all the time! :-)




Isn't he cute?!?

Blessings,
~*~

I'll never forget you...

It has been one year since you left us. You were the sweetest, most wonderful friend to us and we will never forget you. There will never be anyone else like you. You protected us, loved us and never quite understood that you were too big to be a lap dog. When you lost your sight, you kept on going and were more aware of things than I think you were when you could see. I miss you and love you, always.